You open up your incognito menu on your webpage; scrolling that mouse ever so slowly… candidly you type in that naughty address like you have a million times before… so close to seeing those luscious candy red lips, full, perky, perfect breasts, voluptuous, ample ass; and that sexy little shiver and slide you’ve gotten so accustomed to… and…

WHAM!

Just like that, you’re a common criminal. You’re in a lot of trouble, buster. Just like that; up to three years in prison, and a hefty fine.

Pornography was made illegal in the Ukraine in 2009; being defined by the law as “vulgar, candid, cynical, obscene depictions of sexual acts”. These acts, according to the law, pursue no other goal than the explicit demonstration of genitals, unethical elements of sexual acts an perversions, which are no more than unrealistic sketches that do not meet the high moral criteria and honor and dignity of humans because of the inciting of our… instincts. But don’t fret, pornography for ‘medical purposes’ is still legal. That’s good, right?

Under the law, any possession of ANY pornography is a criminal offense netting fines of up to $110 dollars or 5 years in prison; and production of porn had already been illegal for years; which seems pretty stiff (pun intended) for getting your jollies off.

What exactly does medical purposes mean? The Ukrainian minister of Justice made this matter even more complicated when he implicated porn’s medical purposes, but we can only assume he means when a semen sample is required or in the use of psychological research. This leaves a lot of room for interpretation, as it’s not completely clear or concise as to what the law means. While prostitution is definitely on the rise; this bill does nothing to help solve the problem, it actually exacerbates it. People use pornography as a stress reliever; to get some relaxation, and enjoy some “me” time. Literally. All that banning pornography will do is force people to find other ways to get their pleasure- it might actually make the problem worse; or the market will be underground. Pornography certainly won’t disappear though, that’s pretty much a stone cold fact.Please visit at www.cityofeve.com.

One things, for sure, don’t get caught with your pants down in the Ukraine!